Wednesday, September 28, 2005

There is a God, and She works for the Gap

Maggie says:
Warning: Major feminine frivolity ahead!

Tonight I reached a milestone in my entire shopping history. Hell, I reached a milestone in dressing. In one night, a lifetime of memories that involve cringing in front of a large dressing room mirror with terrible lighting seem dimmer, kinder, farther away. And did I mention less likely to happen again?

Four words, ladies: the Gap Curvy Jean. For my fellow girls out there with curves (and we all know who we are), don't walk, RUN to the Gap and buy these jeans. I'm talking a revolution in fit. I'm talking pants that don't try to squash you into a mannequin imitation; these pants embrace curves. They accentuate curves. They fit!

Plus, they also come in all kinds of yummy corduroys. I walked out of there with one pair of jeans and two pairs of cords and visions of comfy sweaters and hot chocolate in my head. Can someone cue the roasting green chile and extra-blanket-needed nights? Because I'm ready.

And to prove the true miracle of the Gap Curvy Jean, I offer this story: at another store a few minutes later, a salesgirl saw my Gap bag. Immediately, she grabs onto my arm and asks me, "Did you get the Curvy Jean? I just bought a pair, too." Now this girl was tall, stick-thin, and had no hips, so I asked her why she chose the Curvy instead of the Gap's other new jean, the Straight. She looks me dead-on and says, "I've never had a butt before and have always wished I was curvy. These jeans make me look like I have something! They're the best things I've ever worn! I'm obsessed!" If you don't believe me, look for the blond, bubbly Macy's employee to verify this story.

Jeans for us (that tiny girls want to wear to be more like us). Butts and hips appreciated. Women happier everywhere. Next up: World Peace?


Blogger mjae said...

I can report in all seriousness that you are NOT exaggerating. I was in the Express, and they've got the same thing -- curvy jeans and cords. I bought one of each. And I feel like I lost 20 pounds, or that 20 pounds are just what I needed to look fucking FANTASTIC.

Now that's a good trend in fashion!

But one more pair wouldn't hurt...I'll have to check out the Gap. What was the price, may I ask?

Express was $29.95 for each.

11:30 AM  
Anonymous Jessie said...

Thank goodness. That #$%@#$& superlow, supertight pants fad made it impossible for me to find pants that fit. I'll have to scrape together some cash to supplement my meager wardrobe before the fashion pendulum swings back... Thanks for the tip, Maggie. I avoid malls like the plague, so I would have completely missed this. Curvy girls unite!

2:21 PM  
Blogger mjae said...

Funny tidbit. The picture is archived as "Assets"

Isn't that poetically appropriate?

Ass-ets indeed. Curvy girls takin OVER.

4:58 PM  

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